Yesterday I went to the community college and picked up a packet of information and paperwork to fill out to attend. I have until the 1st of August to register for fall classes. Since I found out that I will not be made permanent until Lazy Ronald retires next April, it has given me a bit more motivation to get the hell out of there as soon as possible. I am going to turn it in on Monday and hopefully speak to an adviser on what I need to take. 

Speaking of work, the reason I was able to go because I had Thursday off from work. Since they have consolidated our departments for the summer, which is usual apparently, and it will continue into the fucking fall because their building is under renovation, is that in order to keep things “fair” they make everyone work a weekend day in exchange for a week day off. Which fucking sucks because you will never get two days off in a row. So if you want to go anywhere for more than a day you are fucked! If it where fair, they would not treat the people in our department do that and just the assholes that were brought in. 

Also I got into it with a girl I work with. One of the new positions created during the summer is a doorman like position where a person sits in a chair and waves everyone to the right entrance. I merely remarked that it was a nice change of pace from standing behind a counter for 8 hours and she went ballistic and started accusing me of accusing her of being lazy. I reminded her that she was and that I only knew what her ex-best friend told me and then I walked away. In typical crazy bitch fashion she started yelling at me across the main floor as I walked away. She then went into the head manager’s office and tried to get me in trouble. He did not believe her and knew that I meant no harm. The situation defused. Also, she got in trouble with the other supervisors for not respecting the chain of command and going over their heads. They said she is also on thin ice over snapping at other co-workers, lying about being pregnant and faking an injury. 

I also found out my friend Ms. Ruth got a new position and is moving to another department. I will miss her but she will visit and she will be better off than she was. She has a fair share of assholes to deal with, even more so because they give her hell for being Jewish and Canadian. She is the nicest and most generous person that I have ever worked with there. I already miss her.

And the last time I visited my mom she went on another tirade about the length of my hair and the way I am dressed. She kept trying to rationalize her disapproval by saying that I will be more successful with getting jobs that I am not qualified for and that girls will give me “a second look”. Not just any girls, the “girls at Wal-Mart”. Wow, mom. The number one place to pick up chicks. Especially with no teeth and no fucking future. My whole life I have been the invisible man. No one gives me a first look so why should I go out of my way to impress some superficial moron? Besides… I am happy to some extent the way I am! My love life is none of her God damned business. I barely have a social life because I went to school for five years and worked 7 days a week to keep MYSELF up the whole fucking time. I have only two real friends in this world and I cherish them for that and they are all I really need. 

I want out.

“One of these days I am going to tunnel out of this ocean of shit I’m in.”

I had a bad experience at work yesterday. 

My two co-workers, who have been becoming more clique-y and more exclusive toward me, started talking about one of our other co-workers and how great she was. They talked about how hard a worker she was and how they “didn’t have to tell her anything”, and how they could not wait for her to come back. So? Does that mean I am doing a bad job? 

I replaced this girl because she took time off from work because she was surprised to find out that she was 8 months pregnant! How does someone not notice that?!

Anyway, she was gone for and indeterminate amount of time and I could not get along with my current co-worker because he was a lazy, racist asshole. So, I took over her spot. I got along alright with everybody. I made my share of first timer mistakes, but I was praised up and down by my other co-workers and supervisors. They told me I worked much harder than her and kept the work area spotless. 

The two others I work with make me deal with the day to day running of the place and deal with the unwashed masses of humanity that shuffle through everyday while they do prep work in the back… and gab and gossip! They get away with the easy stuff and won’t let me learn how to do it in order to make sure that only they can do. They go on “field trips” together to get supplies and are gone for what seems like hours. They won’t come out to the front to help me, but then bitch at me if it is not perfect. 

Then they pull some shit on how much they liked that girl better, and how much they just loved working with her. I asked outright if that meant I was doing a shitty job and wanted me gone. They didn’t give me a straight answer. I am starting to dread work because of this. But, I brought it up with two different supervisors and a lady who has worked there for close to 20 years and they all said that I had nothing to worry about and that they would not return me to my old position with they douche bag.

On the bright side, two people are retiring and one is transferring. That means that people will be shuffled around and there will be new jobs to be had. I hope that I can transfer back down to the basement. Those people are bitchy but they are upfront about. It is nothing that I had not put up with from them for the last 5 years. 

I just want to get on as a permanent from a temporary. Any hell the give me will be well worth $12.50 a hour with full state employee benefits. I have endured much worse for much less to show for it.