Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me…

I was born this day at 2:13 AM. They said I came out with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck. I guess even from that very young age I had no will to live.

I look back and think, where did all that time go? Did I waste it? Why do I feel so old and worn out?

Not to say that there are no bright spots. But they are stars in the void of the night sky. So isolated and small. Ready to be swallowed up. But I guess I take comfort that even though they are small and striving to survive, where there was just a black void, there is now a million points of light. So I guess they are winning.

I love having manic depression. Every day is a roller coaster of emotion.